The prisoner stood hunched, head stooped but his eyes timidly eying the king. The king sitting stern, stubborn and proud. His eyes unflinching in his determination and his mouth twisted in a tempered fury. The prisoner that stood before him was once a considered trusted, but now his serpent tongue had been caught red with the blood of treason. “Off with his head”.
Imagine this as you. Your Kingdom is your circle. You oversee the lands, its people, their joys and their concerns. You are their king. No one comes before you and no one is above you. Imagine now in your kingdom one of your advisors, spreads malicious words about your rule. Talks about things you have foolishly confided in him about your own concerns for your rule. As this hypothetical king would you put up with this treason. Put up with the serpent in your paradise coaxing others to take a bite of the apple. In a kingdom so uncertain and rule constantly in question of your own doubt, I’d hope the answer is “no, of course not”. You might be considering the hypothetical option of prison. Take no prisoners when it comes to your kingdom.
Rule 3: Make Friends With People Who Want The Best For You.
[Jordan Peterson. 12 Rules For Life: An Antidote to Choas]
Imagine your best friend. You’ve known them all your life. They have been there for you through it all, the good times, the bad times. They want what is best for you and you want the best for them. They have other social circles as do you and occasionally they mix. Imagine for a moment one of their friends actively discourages, belittles and downright disrespects the person you know as your best friend. Would you idly stand by and suggest nothing to your friend. Let them continue to be negatively affected by this person input on their self-esteem and psyche? Again I’d hope the answer is “no, of course not”. Well now imagine that best friend is you. And not swapped places, your best friend is you. A clone if you will, being treated the exact same way. Again – “no, of course not”.
Well then if you have followed my hypotheticals and analogies so far. Let me clear – do not be afraid to cut dead weight out of your life. People whose whole poisonous attitude towards you weighs you down like an anchor. Kick them out!
You might be thinking a few things when you think of the realities of this philosophy to your life. Firstly might be the trepidation with cutting people completely out of your life forever. But please, for your own sake. Cut them like butter, do not let the poison in the wound seep into your bloodstream. You have to respect yourself as if you were another person, your best friend rather, someone you care for deeply. Do not let them person be pray to people who want nothing more than to drag you down to the depths of resentment, anger and jaded living that they operate on. When you sit back and think of yourself like someone you should care for as though you were an outside entity, things come into focus. Take note of how your friends think of you, do they truly see you better than you might see yourself? That’s a rare find in any person but at the very least they should want you to be the best person you can be. They should criticise you constructively when you are going stray and cheer in your side of the stadium when you succeed on a victory. This is what will help you grow to be a better person but more importantly, a better you.
The other concern you may be thinking is something to the tune of “That’s so irrational” or the fear of being called irrational. That your feelings and wanting people around you who actively help and encourage a better community in your circle is somehow alien. That is what is truly poisonous. People who will dismiss your thoughts and feelings to do with your damn self! – as irrationality. They may even mock you or roll their eyes but that is the cunning manipulation of jealousy and hatred. They don’t like that you have a backbone and are willing to stand up for your SELF. So take no prisoners in your kingdom for keeping them around will only spread the stringing words that deconstruct your kingdom slowly from the inside. They will make you the orchestrator of your own downfall by filling your mind with doubt and a self-defeatist attitude. So the next time you catch a serpent in your garden – “off with his head”.